Today marks the start of a very BIG week! This is the first week that Addie has not had to go to the doctor’s for lab work. Yay! We are both very excited about that. We can finally enjoy some cuddle time without worrying about getting ready to go to appointments and look presentable. We can nap together and hang out. I am not sure who is more excited!?
One of (many) things I have realized since giving birth is that I was so caught up in researching and preparing for pregnant life as well as labor and delivery, that I spent very little time becoming well-read in post-partum life. I couldn’t see over the proverbial hill that was my big belly to the future with Baby Addie. I am now trying to do double time. I am reading and researching like a fiend on baby sleep schedules, breast feeding, tummy time, etc… (you get the picture!)
I don’t know if it was the fact that I wasn’t able to hold her four days, or the unknown infection that she was fighting, but now every moment seems so fleeting and fragile. I love this little girl more than I could have ever dreamed of or imagined. I am not sure really how it happened…
There are a few lines within the book I am currently engrossed in that pretty much capture my heart at the moment. In fact, I really can’t even read them without crying.
“They wrapped her up and handed her to …me and I stared in wonder at this little tiny person fresh from heaven. It was as if I could still smell the angels on her, like I was looking straight into the face of God. A God who had just blessed us with so much more than we could have imagined. How amazing that he brings life this way. Through pain and hurt and the ugly things inside us we try to keep hidden away. The things we don’t talk about. In that moment, as I looked at my little girl lying in my arms, I realized this whole process was such a striking picture of how Christ works in us. He takes our disappointments, rejections, and hard times and he makes something beautiful. He creates life and shows us what beauty looks like in places where we look and see nothing. He blesses us beyond our imaginations, in spite of all the broken roads we’ve traveled. As if to remind us that he sees us, not just for who we are t any given moment, but for what we could be one day. I looked at her and saw perfection. And mercy. And grace. I had never seen the hand of God so clearly in my life.” —Melanie Shankle Sparkly Green Earrings